it's what God gave you time for

there was a talk in this recent general conference that i desperately wish was given last year. Elder Anderson's talk about children was exactly what i fasted to hear last october conference. i wanted a prophet to tell me whether or not i should have children. duh mare-not gonna happen. and it didn't. 
one year later a prophet of god has said,

"This commandment has not been forgotten or set aside in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We express deep gratitude for the enormous faith shown by husbands and wives (especially our wives) in their willingness to have children. When to have a child and how many children to have are private decisions to be made between a husband and wife and the Lord. These are sacred decisions—decisions that should be made with sincere prayer and acted on with great faith."

 i bring this up because having children, for me, did require ENORMOUS faith that i didn't have. i knew i wanted to be a mother, but i wasn't so sure about it. it's safe to say it was one of the greater leaps of faith i've taken in my life. i guess i was swayed by the world. sadly. swayed to think my selfish dreams may die with a child's birth. Elder Anderson quotes an incredible blogger who explains our culture's negative thoughts about motherhood,

“[Growing] up in this culture, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood. … Children rank way below college. Below world travel for sure. Below the ability to go out at night at your leisure. Below honing your body at the gym. Below any job you may have or hope to get.” 

after hoping for some counsel at conference a year ago and receiving none, i took a leap of faith into the darkness. and i can tell you now, even in the darkness, that was the second best step i've taken in my life. i can hardly believe i was scared of something so wonderful. 

sure, half the time life doesn't remotely resemble these silly smiling pictures. it's messy, and tiring, and work! i air dry my hair, shave in sixty seconds, and eat with one hand. 

"Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. 
It is what God gave you time for.

please read the article Elder Anderson quotes here. it's amazing.